Well its been a full week and i cant use the excuse of being on holiday and not having a lap top.
It has been a week of decision making, trauma and stress.
I can only say that losing Michael was the one thing that kept me upright. Knowing that nothing is as bad as that. The problem i was having was with the people around me and quite honestly i need them like i need a hole in the head. It got so bad that on Tuesday i handed in my notice!!!
Yep i phoned my boss wrote the letter, put my coat on well actually in the opposite order!!
Coat on and about to leave when i stopped and thought no its not professional!! so did the decent thing, phoned my boss and asked if they could spare a moment and then said why. Then i wrote the letter. Phoned Tim and said i wouldn't be home for lunch, not telling him what i was doing!!!! Tim would have been glad i think.
I could re visit last week and all it would do would make me upset again and i don't need it. Running gave me an outlet and for that i am very grateful.
My boss came over and was very supportive and would not accept my notice, asked me to reconsider and try to work things out.
He spoke to some people and i was later to discover from them that they was not happy that he had spoke to them. Well oh dear, we all have our crosses to bear.
I have managed to get things sorted in my head now, it didn't help to find out that i probably have skin cancer and off to see a specialist at the beginning of Feb. It was my birthday as well and that was miserable, i just should have taken time off!!
I realise that many people have egos and if they are not pandered to feel bereft! gee i feel sad for them, but its not going to happen.
I had a hard lesson to learn last week. The problem is i am so gullible, i always see the best in people and never think that anyone could be anything other than being honest! ha i should have learnt that from what happened after Mikey died. What a damn fool i am.
I miss my colleague! maybe we will be able to be in touch soon! i live in hope.
Sunday was race day and i still cant believe our time. Something must have spurred us on 5.25 miles in 50 Min's now that is really good!! so i ended the week on a positive note and hope this week will continue in the same vein. Well until 5.20pm it was, ah well tomorrow is another day..................................
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