Day 151

My mood swings are as frequent as a hormonal teenager! Pity they are not for the same reason!

Still today has been a good day, work has kept me really busy and i have enjoyed the challenges that work has given me. A few weeks ago i would never had said that.

Its almost 6 months since we lost Mikey. Our sense of loss remains as great today as then but we are getting through the days. We are getting better at keeping our feelings to ourselves and just sharing our feelings with each other.
I still find it very difficult when the conversation turns to Mikey from others and  apart from Tim and Tom i am uncomfortable in case i start crying again.
Keeping a tight rein on my emotions comes at a cost and i guess I'm lucky i work with a close group of people who understand me, warts and all.

My knee is feeling much better and i am once again looking forward to getting out running, soon i hope. Still feeling really tired from this chest infection and hope that soon resolves, then i can get back to normal!!

It was raining this morning and to my shame i jumped in the car instead of cycling! must try better!! It talks of snow for the weekend!

Flicking through the diary of 2002 and also discovered that that year Mikey had his port fitted so it would appear he had lots of changes in his life then. Its hard to imagine how we managed really. I was working in a unit for the brain injured and that was really hard work, at the same time Mikey was having his IV's at home, i was working full time ,taking him to appointments etc. Tim was working then too so i was juggling all roles. As a parent of a child with CF its amazing what you can do when pushed to the limits. That may be what we miss as well, the constant worry. We no longer have that. Poor Tom he really did miss out on so much of our time, and looking back he never once complained about it.

Tim's birthday tomorrow! i hope his pressie comes. I have ordered from Play.com! another first Mikey!!

Few more weeks and we will go and see Sally Morgan at the Cresset, getting a little bit anxious about it, but apparently she is a very good medium, we shall see.
Well better go and drink another litre of juice, it will soon be Friday. Linda rang today and she has lost 12 pounds!!!! i have lost up to today a measly 4 pounds!!! how has she done it!! and she isn't exercising. I must be doing something wrong. Oh and must sort out that item of clothing to squeeze into!! and take along to Joys eeek well i do have plenty to chose from!
Swimming tomorrow and try to burn those few extra ounces every little helps and if i  fail today i just need to remember in all things that, Tomorrow is another day...........