I wondered to myself if things can get any worse. The answer is losing Mikey has been the worst thing ever that has happened to us so may be i mean can things ever get any better. There is no light on my horizon that's for sure! The Gods must be warring because all the elements are swirling around making life on Earth a nightmare for many of us this week!!!!
We went to the solicitors this morning to sign the new wills we have made. Tim forgot his glasses so couldn't see what he was signing. I should have taken advantage of that! Tim's going to talk to Tom this week end to let him know where everything can be found etc. Tim wishes his ashes to go in with Mike, um not sure what will happen to mine!!! We feel better now that's all settled.
Its a week tomorrow since Tim and I had our conversation and we are both making big efforts to work together, i just hope in trying hard we don't end up causing more problems. Tim made a Dr's appointment though without me having to ask so that's really positive. Tonight he was talking about taking medication and even said he wondered if they would help his continuous headaches. I said i thought they would.
I'm sitting in Mikeys bedroom and looking around wishing there was something of his here. Claire took the two items that have been sitting in prominent position for years, and i miss their familiarity. Its a comfort thing.
In many ways going back to work has helped, it has certainly ensured that i have no time to spend thinking about Mikey. It has also given me time to think about my future, this is an area that consideration for mine and Tims well being must be made. Tim was adamant tonight that my happiness in employment was essential and since Mikey has died even more so.
My walking/jogging was going well. I went out on the road again tonight and pulled my back i think. Its affecting my left leg so i was hobbling along tonight!! I did take a torch with me because one section of the road i use is poorly lit and i though i may just fall, i do take my mobile and thought that i may have had to call Tim to fetch me home!!! Couple of my favourite tracks of music kept me going though. Must get myself some proper trainers!!!! A must.
I am pleased the week end is here, Tim said he wished we had booked a week end away!! After the two weeks we had i was a little surprised. I may look to see if we can get in anywhere next week end.
Well I'm going to try for an early night! I did say try!
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