Home again, home again jiggedy jig! phew. and what a day today proved to be. Oh my word!!
Early start again and managed to get some photos of the sunrise, not as spectacular as yesterday but at least i tried. Taking photos from the car had other drivers slow up thinking they had been caught by the near by speed cameras! Oops
Settled down with my book on the train ready for the off, oh must change at Cambridge, climbing all these stairs on the stations has played havoc with the knee and had it screaming with outrage at the pressures put on it these past two days!
Off to Liverpool street station and must remember to go to fenchurch and not Billericay!!!
More stairs!! and find a taxi. Not the most pleasant breed of people are they if you are not going long distances!!! still they are there to provide a service after all.
No time to wait and its off to Leigh on Sea. What a trip, stopped at every station i think but loads of seats. Managed to get to my destination on time! once discovering how far i needed to go it was another taxi!
The home i went to was outstanding, cant describe how lavish it was!!! But was ready to finish just after 2pm. That really played havoc with all my plans!!!!
Caught an early train to Fenchurch street, raining!!! negotiated my way out eventually and another taxi ride to Liverpool street station and straight onto a train to Cambridge. Not sure about getting connection to March but would worry about that later.
Sister Linda text me and then went onto net to find me connection times, what a star!!!
Safely home about an hour before i thought i would be.
This evening Tom came to see how i managed! and stayed till late. Lovely and now i am to be let lose by myself tomorrow.
I would imagine the staff will find it hard me coming into the home, they will not have a clue who i am or what to expect, having said that it will be just the same for me.
Funnily enough Tim said tonight how me being away and travelling all over made him think very much of Mikey and we both became a little emotional, its hard still not to become upset. The thing about today has been this feeling of anticipation, waiting, and its all to do with not having Mikey here to share everything with. The need to talk and tell him what i have been doing has been overwhelming and still now i just wish......................... Its not going to happen is it?
So i remain very tired and have another early start tomorrow, not as early i hasten to say but still..........
Do you know i think i need a run. I missed Tuesdays training. Ah well tomorrow is another day.............
Wednesday 29 August 2012
Tuesday 28 August 2012
Day 749
Making the time before i crawl into bed!!!
Up with the crack of dawn to make my way to Ely to catch the train to London.
It was glorious, seeing the sunrise instead of sunset made a pleasant change and how beautiful the start of the day was. We have no mountains here but this morning you could be forgiven for actually thinking we had. The early morning changes with the cloud formation dark on the horizon, we had our very own mountain range made of clouds. Mystical, especially with Ely cathedral pushing herself proudly through the early morning mist that was around Sutton. The sun gradually rising a Sharp silver halo to those clouds close by, the warmth already penetrating the damp soil and there we had it, smokey tendrils of moisture rising ever upwards. Amazing!
Manged to get on the right strain, change at Cambridge, and onto London Liverpool street. From there to Billericay.
I passed Stratford and there was the Olympic stadium. I gazed with wonder and for the first time it actually hit home that i had run there in that very place. I could hardly believe it. The journey itself was tinged with sadness and made me think very much of Mikey.
It was however the journey home that nearly had me weeping into my book.
A young family boarded the train at Stratford and the little boy was the sweetest of children. He glanced over and smiled. That was it i so envied the parents and thought how much joy our children gave us when they were that age. I desperately wanted to say treasure these moments because once gone they truly cannot be recovered, never to return again. But who wants to be told that!! i would have thought they were bonkers if i had be approached like that!
The day itself was mind numbing, so much to take in the brain went into overload. Impossible to absorb all the information. Didn't manage to get it all done but i was told that some one from head office would come to see me and go over what was missed. Lovely people and made me feel very welcome. Oh and i took some photos just to convince myself and everyone else, that yes i did manage to get to destination and return! Oh and no sign of the Lion!!!
So I'm exhausted!!! and ready for bed, so only a short one tonight, but tomorrow is another day....................
Up with the crack of dawn to make my way to Ely to catch the train to London.
It was glorious, seeing the sunrise instead of sunset made a pleasant change and how beautiful the start of the day was. We have no mountains here but this morning you could be forgiven for actually thinking we had. The early morning changes with the cloud formation dark on the horizon, we had our very own mountain range made of clouds. Mystical, especially with Ely cathedral pushing herself proudly through the early morning mist that was around Sutton. The sun gradually rising a Sharp silver halo to those clouds close by, the warmth already penetrating the damp soil and there we had it, smokey tendrils of moisture rising ever upwards. Amazing!
Manged to get on the right strain, change at Cambridge, and onto London Liverpool street. From there to Billericay.
I passed Stratford and there was the Olympic stadium. I gazed with wonder and for the first time it actually hit home that i had run there in that very place. I could hardly believe it. The journey itself was tinged with sadness and made me think very much of Mikey.
It was however the journey home that nearly had me weeping into my book.
A young family boarded the train at Stratford and the little boy was the sweetest of children. He glanced over and smiled. That was it i so envied the parents and thought how much joy our children gave us when they were that age. I desperately wanted to say treasure these moments because once gone they truly cannot be recovered, never to return again. But who wants to be told that!! i would have thought they were bonkers if i had be approached like that!
The day itself was mind numbing, so much to take in the brain went into overload. Impossible to absorb all the information. Didn't manage to get it all done but i was told that some one from head office would come to see me and go over what was missed. Lovely people and made me feel very welcome. Oh and i took some photos just to convince myself and everyone else, that yes i did manage to get to destination and return! Oh and no sign of the Lion!!!
So I'm exhausted!!! and ready for bed, so only a short one tonight, but tomorrow is another day....................
Monday 27 August 2012
Day 748
It could only happen to me!!! Off to Essex tomorrow only to discover there is a Lion on the loose!!! whats the betting i don't come face to face with it. Mikey you would be laughing now and no doubt sending worrying messages!!!
I'm all ready i think, lots to learn so a mix of anticipation and anxiety! still nothing ventured so they say!!! Rail cards, maps, time tables etc and and camera just in case i see the lion! all in my Mary Poppins bag.
Cant explain how much i value all the messages i have received, makes me feel loved!! that's a special gift that only people can give isn't it. Makes you think that there is hope for the human race after all. I know there is one person who reads this blog and she lives across the other side of the world. I love her messages and i think its amazing that she takes the time to offer support and share her wonderful photos and stories with me.
Bought myself a cycle helmet today, i look a right Dilly but the roads are getting so busy now. Tim said i looked OK but well i wonder............
Sister Jen, oh dear, chatted to her today to see how her running went and I'm sitting here smiling just thinking about what occurred and i really shouldn't! I'm sure she wont mind me sharing. So off she goes last week, locking everything up, including her husband in the garden. This lead to him climbing over the garden wall, fracturing his heel and Jen going to A and E instead of her run!! In their 60,s can you picture it??? Its not funny is it? still smiling..................
Been for a run tonight with my buddy, her language was quite choice when i told her how far we was going to go, not what you would expect from someone of her social standing!!!! So we compromised and had a ride as well afterwards!.
So to bed its getting late and i have to be up really early, why am i worrying after all tomorrow is another day.....................
I'm all ready i think, lots to learn so a mix of anticipation and anxiety! still nothing ventured so they say!!! Rail cards, maps, time tables etc and and camera just in case i see the lion! all in my Mary Poppins bag.
Cant explain how much i value all the messages i have received, makes me feel loved!! that's a special gift that only people can give isn't it. Makes you think that there is hope for the human race after all. I know there is one person who reads this blog and she lives across the other side of the world. I love her messages and i think its amazing that she takes the time to offer support and share her wonderful photos and stories with me.
Bought myself a cycle helmet today, i look a right Dilly but the roads are getting so busy now. Tim said i looked OK but well i wonder............
Sister Jen, oh dear, chatted to her today to see how her running went and I'm sitting here smiling just thinking about what occurred and i really shouldn't! I'm sure she wont mind me sharing. So off she goes last week, locking everything up, including her husband in the garden. This lead to him climbing over the garden wall, fracturing his heel and Jen going to A and E instead of her run!! In their 60,s can you picture it??? Its not funny is it? still smiling..................
Been for a run tonight with my buddy, her language was quite choice when i told her how far we was going to go, not what you would expect from someone of her social standing!!!! So we compromised and had a ride as well afterwards!.
So to bed its getting late and i have to be up really early, why am i worrying after all tomorrow is another day.....................
Sunday 26 August 2012
Day 746/747
Ah well it didn't last but still not too tardy! Making the most of tonight as i will be hitting the sack early for the next few days. Early starts! Need to be in Ely for the 0545 train!!! jeez i hope i get up!!
Day in the garden again, making the most of the last few days peace and quiet, catching up on some reading, doing some studying! and out for a ride this evening. Nothing interesting.
I had fab afternoon yesterday shopping, cant believe i spent so much on a bag, but sometimes you just have to push the boat out. Um but i think was pushing and baling at the same time!! Then i hit Marks and Sparks, Per Una , love it. So did they yesterday.
Storms oh my word, we had hours of thunder and lightening and torrential rain. I dodged the showers in the City but got caught on the cycle ride home from the station! Still hey ho it was worth it. No Tim waiting and tutting outside the shops, lovely!
There was some localised flooding and houses in Knights End had sandbags at the doors so must have been bad. I did take loads of photos of the lightning but sadly must have missed each time. Ah well practise makes perfect.
I then spent a bit of time checking the routes of my days out this week. Oh my good gracious, I'm bound to get lost. Me lose in London alone! really doesn't bear thinking about. I still get lost when i go out on my training runs!
Knee was rather sore yesterday. I think it was all the stairs i climbed at the stations, need to do some stretching tomorrow. I'm off for a run tomorrow instead of Tuesday as i will not be home in time. Lets hope i manage Thursday.
Lovely chat with friend on line, i have missed her company and must try to meet up outside of working hours.
Today is the last day of my just giving page, and i will have to contact Papworth again to let them know. I will then have a cheque apparently to have photo taken with for hand over to the CF unit. Not sure when that will be.
Cant believe that we will hear in October if we are successful in the London Marathon ballot. I will try and raise money for Papworth again, but its so hard these days as everyone is struggling with the cost of living.
So to bed, Mikey this week is going to be really interesting!!!! but for now tomorrow is another day........................................
Day in the garden again, making the most of the last few days peace and quiet, catching up on some reading, doing some studying! and out for a ride this evening. Nothing interesting.
I had fab afternoon yesterday shopping, cant believe i spent so much on a bag, but sometimes you just have to push the boat out. Um but i think was pushing and baling at the same time!! Then i hit Marks and Sparks, Per Una , love it. So did they yesterday.
Storms oh my word, we had hours of thunder and lightening and torrential rain. I dodged the showers in the City but got caught on the cycle ride home from the station! Still hey ho it was worth it. No Tim waiting and tutting outside the shops, lovely!
There was some localised flooding and houses in Knights End had sandbags at the doors so must have been bad. I did take loads of photos of the lightning but sadly must have missed each time. Ah well practise makes perfect.
I then spent a bit of time checking the routes of my days out this week. Oh my good gracious, I'm bound to get lost. Me lose in London alone! really doesn't bear thinking about. I still get lost when i go out on my training runs!
Knee was rather sore yesterday. I think it was all the stairs i climbed at the stations, need to do some stretching tomorrow. I'm off for a run tomorrow instead of Tuesday as i will not be home in time. Lets hope i manage Thursday.
Lovely chat with friend on line, i have missed her company and must try to meet up outside of working hours.
Today is the last day of my just giving page, and i will have to contact Papworth again to let them know. I will then have a cheque apparently to have photo taken with for hand over to the CF unit. Not sure when that will be.
Cant believe that we will hear in October if we are successful in the London Marathon ballot. I will try and raise money for Papworth again, but its so hard these days as everyone is struggling with the cost of living.
So to bed, Mikey this week is going to be really interesting!!!! but for now tomorrow is another day........................................
Friday 24 August 2012
Day 745
Well its a bit late but at least i made it before bed. Next week however may be a little different. But interesting I'm sure.
Today i had a visit from a friend from ex work and she returned some of my belongings at last! but shes off on hols now but lovely to see her even if it was just briefly over the gate so to speak.
I at last heard from my new job and confirmed times etc for Tues!! rather nervous and yet looking forward to a new challenge. Challenges a plenty and that's just travelling for my induction.
I think its fair to say my sense of direction is a tad flawed so deary me how i will cope next week i really do not know. Thursday and Friday will be fine its Tuesday and Wednesday that's the problem.
Tuesday i have to be in Billericay!!! looked at the drive and its down near where Mikey lived, cant face that journey by myself. We came that way when i was training earlier in the year and it really upset me. We didn't go down very often at all because Tim hated the M25. To late to wish we had now.
Wednesday i have to be in Leigh on Sea!! near Southend. Never been that far South before so how i will cope crossing London alone well it bemuses me. Still I'm sure i will manage. I expect to be tired. Leave Ely just after 5 and get home at 8pm so i will fall into bed Tuesday night and out the next morning.
The following week its Ipswich and then two weeks later i think its Oxford!!!
Had all my papers sent through today and my word looks like i will be busy! After the trials and tribulations since June i can feel a little relieved.
I can feel another shopping day coming on!!!
Had another visitor later in the day now that was a surprise.
So Mikey lots of changes and I'm certainly doing something different each month. I wondered what i would do when the Marathon in May was completed but i need not have worried! June uncertainty about work and at home. July finished work. August start new job!!!! Not sure what September will bring but October op on cartilages. Then we will see!! in the meantime, tomorrow is another day.............
Today i had a visit from a friend from ex work and she returned some of my belongings at last! but shes off on hols now but lovely to see her even if it was just briefly over the gate so to speak.
I at last heard from my new job and confirmed times etc for Tues!! rather nervous and yet looking forward to a new challenge. Challenges a plenty and that's just travelling for my induction.
I think its fair to say my sense of direction is a tad flawed so deary me how i will cope next week i really do not know. Thursday and Friday will be fine its Tuesday and Wednesday that's the problem.
Tuesday i have to be in Billericay!!! looked at the drive and its down near where Mikey lived, cant face that journey by myself. We came that way when i was training earlier in the year and it really upset me. We didn't go down very often at all because Tim hated the M25. To late to wish we had now.
Wednesday i have to be in Leigh on Sea!! near Southend. Never been that far South before so how i will cope crossing London alone well it bemuses me. Still I'm sure i will manage. I expect to be tired. Leave Ely just after 5 and get home at 8pm so i will fall into bed Tuesday night and out the next morning.
The following week its Ipswich and then two weeks later i think its Oxford!!!
Had all my papers sent through today and my word looks like i will be busy! After the trials and tribulations since June i can feel a little relieved.
I can feel another shopping day coming on!!!
Had another visitor later in the day now that was a surprise.
So Mikey lots of changes and I'm certainly doing something different each month. I wondered what i would do when the Marathon in May was completed but i need not have worried! June uncertainty about work and at home. July finished work. August start new job!!!! Not sure what September will bring but October op on cartilages. Then we will see!! in the meantime, tomorrow is another day.............
Thursday 23 August 2012
Day 744
Yes I'm here again! cant quite get my head around the fact I'm keeping up to date!
Not sure whats happening with this blinking computer but will have to have it seen to. My resistance must be low because I'm getting loads of virus,s!
So nothing really remarkable has occurred today! Another quiet morning followed by an afternoon shopping! yay just love it. A quiet afternoon sorting photos, and a visit from Tom before my run. So all in all today passed by as it usually does.
Driving to Lynn this afternoon gave me time to reflect on the seasons. The leaves are already starting to drop but the crows remain quite elusive and I'm not sure what that means. No raucous noises from the trees or the surrounding fields. Very strange.
The bird we found yesterday was just sitting on the road with some leaves and i missed it initially. Tim spotted it, as it was well camouflaged.
The tarmac roads are cracking badly. Not sure if this is due to the weather and dryness or due to heavy traffic use. The roads around here are far busier than they ever used to be.
I wonder what our Autumn and winter will be like. I move to quickly into the advancing year!
Still haven't heard about travel arrangements etc for next week. If nothing tomorrow then i will call an check but it is now very close to the time I'm due to start. I hate rushing arrangements.
Another friend has contacted me which is wonderful, she no longer works where i did and has made good career choice. I'm not alone!!
Tom was impressed with the quality of the photos i took yesterday so i must continue to practise. I understand its all in the eye!
Tonight's run went really well, in fact better than pre marathon, just need to keep it up. What a shame its happened so close to the op! I know i will be set back again in the winter. Tonight though i was pushed and i thought not sure if i will complete this, but i made the commitment once i was running on the other side of the river. Amazed at my time 6.2 miles 1hr 09mins! cracking for me. Now I'm worn out. Lets hope Sundays run is good too! I was told that the body takes some time to recover from the demands of a Marathon and i can certainly support that notion. You really do get a buzz from a good run.
How nice it is to end the day with positive thoughts. I never know when those dark days will happen, but when they do its so grim. Everything becomes grey and you are just going through the motions of living. Mikey would never have wanted us to feel like that. No one has ever come back and told us what its like after death, i wonder if Stephen Hawkins view is correct. He believes we are just computers and when we die the switch is off and there is nothing at all. Gone no afterlife just gone!! Cold thought and whilst i am not religious i do have to believe in something. It may be that I'm wrong but in order to cope with loss we do what we can to get through. I cannot accept that all what Mikey was has no significance and no meaning. He contributed so much and his memories are an essence that keeps us going. So Stephen Hawkins, clever man you may well be but have you no soul? perhaps that's a debate for another day!
After that i remain positive and my shopping bags are calling me. I need a quick reminder of my purchases! Now what was it, um new skirt! will i ever wear it? new shoes, now there is a surprise! new top, um different for me but i do need to change my look. Ah i will say about toms comment in a sec. Running socks, they even have L and R on so i don't get in a muddle!!!! Yet again i was taking the wrong route whilst running tonight and needed calling back!
I cant remember if i wrote this in one of my earlier blogs this week, i may have done but i have never been back and read any of the blogs. Maybe i will one day but certainly not now.
Anyway i said i would like a little convertible for me!! Tom laughed and said not a good idea mum as your cheeks will flap against the trees as you go past them. Don't you love them really!!! i appear to be an item of ridicule!! Earlier Tim and Tom checked some pictures of me running. Tim said when did you get that green top? i had to look because i haven't got a green top. It was a rather large gentleman that runs for another club and yes, i was behind him but passed him on the next bend!! Beasts both of them as they laughed their heads off!
Well to browse and bed, and not worry about work, after all tomorrow is another day................
Not sure whats happening with this blinking computer but will have to have it seen to. My resistance must be low because I'm getting loads of virus,s!
So nothing really remarkable has occurred today! Another quiet morning followed by an afternoon shopping! yay just love it. A quiet afternoon sorting photos, and a visit from Tom before my run. So all in all today passed by as it usually does.
Driving to Lynn this afternoon gave me time to reflect on the seasons. The leaves are already starting to drop but the crows remain quite elusive and I'm not sure what that means. No raucous noises from the trees or the surrounding fields. Very strange.
The bird we found yesterday was just sitting on the road with some leaves and i missed it initially. Tim spotted it, as it was well camouflaged.
The tarmac roads are cracking badly. Not sure if this is due to the weather and dryness or due to heavy traffic use. The roads around here are far busier than they ever used to be.
I wonder what our Autumn and winter will be like. I move to quickly into the advancing year!
Still haven't heard about travel arrangements etc for next week. If nothing tomorrow then i will call an check but it is now very close to the time I'm due to start. I hate rushing arrangements.
Another friend has contacted me which is wonderful, she no longer works where i did and has made good career choice. I'm not alone!!
Tom was impressed with the quality of the photos i took yesterday so i must continue to practise. I understand its all in the eye!
Tonight's run went really well, in fact better than pre marathon, just need to keep it up. What a shame its happened so close to the op! I know i will be set back again in the winter. Tonight though i was pushed and i thought not sure if i will complete this, but i made the commitment once i was running on the other side of the river. Amazed at my time 6.2 miles 1hr 09mins! cracking for me. Now I'm worn out. Lets hope Sundays run is good too! I was told that the body takes some time to recover from the demands of a Marathon and i can certainly support that notion. You really do get a buzz from a good run.
How nice it is to end the day with positive thoughts. I never know when those dark days will happen, but when they do its so grim. Everything becomes grey and you are just going through the motions of living. Mikey would never have wanted us to feel like that. No one has ever come back and told us what its like after death, i wonder if Stephen Hawkins view is correct. He believes we are just computers and when we die the switch is off and there is nothing at all. Gone no afterlife just gone!! Cold thought and whilst i am not religious i do have to believe in something. It may be that I'm wrong but in order to cope with loss we do what we can to get through. I cannot accept that all what Mikey was has no significance and no meaning. He contributed so much and his memories are an essence that keeps us going. So Stephen Hawkins, clever man you may well be but have you no soul? perhaps that's a debate for another day!
After that i remain positive and my shopping bags are calling me. I need a quick reminder of my purchases! Now what was it, um new skirt! will i ever wear it? new shoes, now there is a surprise! new top, um different for me but i do need to change my look. Ah i will say about toms comment in a sec. Running socks, they even have L and R on so i don't get in a muddle!!!! Yet again i was taking the wrong route whilst running tonight and needed calling back!
I cant remember if i wrote this in one of my earlier blogs this week, i may have done but i have never been back and read any of the blogs. Maybe i will one day but certainly not now.
Anyway i said i would like a little convertible for me!! Tom laughed and said not a good idea mum as your cheeks will flap against the trees as you go past them. Don't you love them really!!! i appear to be an item of ridicule!! Earlier Tim and Tom checked some pictures of me running. Tim said when did you get that green top? i had to look because i haven't got a green top. It was a rather large gentleman that runs for another club and yes, i was behind him but passed him on the next bend!! Beasts both of them as they laughed their heads off!
Well to browse and bed, and not worry about work, after all tomorrow is another day................
Wednesday 22 August 2012
Day 743
I'm getting good at this. I seem to be on a bit of a roll.
After the trials of yesterday and the fence work, today has been rather relaxing! In fact its been a good day.
Lazy morning followed by lunch in the garden. Catching up on emails and messages. A stroll to town and browsing through nick knacks. a lovely chat with a fellow local, that's a novelty these days.
Watching Farkle run and win! what a good horse he is and then a gentle walk taking some photos and trying out the bigger lens!
By now it was late evening, time for sitting down and chatting! how Tim hates the computer. I watch him look at it as if its some alien entity that has taken root in our home, something to plan to destroy at a later date. He hasn't yet worked out how to get past the female guardian of the wretched thing! Ah well pay back time me thinks.
Still waiting for confirmation about next week. If not heard by Friday morning i will assume that all the paperwork not back yet. So frustrating the waiting. Cant plan!!
Had a message from another of Mikey's friends today and it was lovely but sad knowing that she too is /was a parent of a young man with CF. 5 years and she misses her son more than ever. Did make me feel normal in a strange way!
How many times have i mentioned in this blog that i love the fens. Yet again she put on such a display for me that the camera was going off on its own!! I have Mikey to thank for that. I hope a hobby i will continue with into my old age, well until i cannot get out and about anyway.
So i will put some pics on, because it feels right.
Work in progress
not too bad just needs treating now!
Harvesting
the birds came out so clearly
Oooh its getting really late best get to bed, can always put some more on later, after all tomorrow is another day.............................................
After the trials of yesterday and the fence work, today has been rather relaxing! In fact its been a good day.
Lazy morning followed by lunch in the garden. Catching up on emails and messages. A stroll to town and browsing through nick knacks. a lovely chat with a fellow local, that's a novelty these days.
Watching Farkle run and win! what a good horse he is and then a gentle walk taking some photos and trying out the bigger lens!
By now it was late evening, time for sitting down and chatting! how Tim hates the computer. I watch him look at it as if its some alien entity that has taken root in our home, something to plan to destroy at a later date. He hasn't yet worked out how to get past the female guardian of the wretched thing! Ah well pay back time me thinks.
Still waiting for confirmation about next week. If not heard by Friday morning i will assume that all the paperwork not back yet. So frustrating the waiting. Cant plan!!
Had a message from another of Mikey's friends today and it was lovely but sad knowing that she too is /was a parent of a young man with CF. 5 years and she misses her son more than ever. Did make me feel normal in a strange way!
How many times have i mentioned in this blog that i love the fens. Yet again she put on such a display for me that the camera was going off on its own!! I have Mikey to thank for that. I hope a hobby i will continue with into my old age, well until i cannot get out and about anyway.
So i will put some pics on, because it feels right.
Work in progress
not too bad just needs treating now!
the birds came out so clearly
Oooh its getting really late best get to bed, can always put some more on later, after all tomorrow is another day.............................................
Tuesday 21 August 2012
Day 741,742
Well it didn't last did it! still missing one day isn't so bad.
So busy yesterday building the fence and the saga continues! Nothing ever easy or simple in my life.
Up early in order to collect supplies to get cracking. Um those nails, should be with heads or without! both afterall men can never tell you exactly what they want and um why don't they go themselves it would make life so much more simple. Still as i said , not in this household.
On my return work in progress and one slat standing alone, um now that doesn't look too promising. The thought was that rather than dismantle the existing fence and use the slats which are the correct size to see if i could buy some more and that way still keep the fence up whilst new one being built. OK so off i go on my bike, the traffic horrendous just outside and there are traffic lights and workmen out in force. Get to DIY no slats but a 6 foot ready prepared piece not what we wanted but easier and cheaper to dismantle the new piece. Now I'm not too good on a bike at the best of times and trying to balance a 6ftx3ft piece on the handlebars was too risky even for me . So i may as well carry it home. You can imagine it cant you. It could only be a woman that carries her own garden fence through the high street to stop and talk over it. The looks and comments i got were varied! does no one walk or carry things anymore!
Husband waiting as i walk down the drive, wheres your bike! needless to say it was hot and sticky and i felt a heatwave rage come on, quietly simmering just below the surface.
Work quickly began on dismantling it. Cup of tea, and by the way i need some bolts and a bit of creosote!!! excuse me what was that!
Sipping the tea and beginning to feel refreshed decided the best way forward and which route to go to the shops after all this time i may be best going to the local hardware store.
3 shops later i managed to get all said requirements and i hadn't managed to get my bits. That would have to be later then.
Bolts appear not to be quite long enough. Oh and why is that i as??? rage now simmering gently over the sides in buckets of heavily dripped sarcasm i asked if it would ave been better to go himself as i had had every bolt off the displays only to discover the bit sticking out was the same what ever the size you buy!! it was then that the hack saw was suggested. Time for male species to back off!!! a dangerous breed is the female species when seriously miffed!
Oh and did i mention the long walk back to collect my bike, um i thought not.
Late afternoon work complete! and i was exhausted, what was that? had i booked the car in for a service grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
Late afternoon tea in the garden and a late night walk out with Duke and the day was done, well not quite because whilst doing some research found some very interesting news.
Yay, yippee, handstands, cartwheels etc etc, who was it that says revenge is a dish best served cold!!! well i enjoyed a lovely slice last night and savouring a little more today. Delicious!
A slightly different day today. Visitors this morning bought Ti ms sister and husband to the door. The first time i have been in the house the same time as them since before Mikey's funeral. Quite strange really. Still the morning had gone before i knew it, lunch and then a ride out before running was the plan. Mid lunch Tom arrived and stayed for most of the afternoon. Oh dear when Tim and Tom get bees in their bonnets its like a war zone and I'm stuck in the middle! why is it that no one wants to give ground. As a peacemaker, usually you upset one or the other. Time to run!!!!
Had a really good run tonight, a little cooler and the knee felt OK plus i was in the mood to burn off some energy! We made really good time tonight. Just to round the night off we had a ride through flagrass to cool the muscles down! The nights are really drawing in and we needed lights on at 2030hrs.
Still a little frosty at home! but quickly thawed and a pleasant evening watching the Queens mother in law. Fascinating story.
Mickeys friend told us during her visit that another of his friends was very poorly at the moment. How sad it is an how cruel CF is. If only we had a cure it would be wonderful. Its that thought and that situation that makes me realise just how insignificant everything else in life is. Live for the moment because tomorrow may never come!
But for the most of us mere mortals that's what we think about isn't it, today, tomorrow , yesterday. Every day i close my blog with the same words. But for me its just that, tomorrow is just another day..........................
So busy yesterday building the fence and the saga continues! Nothing ever easy or simple in my life.
Up early in order to collect supplies to get cracking. Um those nails, should be with heads or without! both afterall men can never tell you exactly what they want and um why don't they go themselves it would make life so much more simple. Still as i said , not in this household.
On my return work in progress and one slat standing alone, um now that doesn't look too promising. The thought was that rather than dismantle the existing fence and use the slats which are the correct size to see if i could buy some more and that way still keep the fence up whilst new one being built. OK so off i go on my bike, the traffic horrendous just outside and there are traffic lights and workmen out in force. Get to DIY no slats but a 6 foot ready prepared piece not what we wanted but easier and cheaper to dismantle the new piece. Now I'm not too good on a bike at the best of times and trying to balance a 6ftx3ft piece on the handlebars was too risky even for me . So i may as well carry it home. You can imagine it cant you. It could only be a woman that carries her own garden fence through the high street to stop and talk over it. The looks and comments i got were varied! does no one walk or carry things anymore!
Husband waiting as i walk down the drive, wheres your bike! needless to say it was hot and sticky and i felt a heatwave rage come on, quietly simmering just below the surface.
Work quickly began on dismantling it. Cup of tea, and by the way i need some bolts and a bit of creosote!!! excuse me what was that!
Sipping the tea and beginning to feel refreshed decided the best way forward and which route to go to the shops after all this time i may be best going to the local hardware store.
3 shops later i managed to get all said requirements and i hadn't managed to get my bits. That would have to be later then.
Bolts appear not to be quite long enough. Oh and why is that i as??? rage now simmering gently over the sides in buckets of heavily dripped sarcasm i asked if it would ave been better to go himself as i had had every bolt off the displays only to discover the bit sticking out was the same what ever the size you buy!! it was then that the hack saw was suggested. Time for male species to back off!!! a dangerous breed is the female species when seriously miffed!
Oh and did i mention the long walk back to collect my bike, um i thought not.
Late afternoon work complete! and i was exhausted, what was that? had i booked the car in for a service grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
Late afternoon tea in the garden and a late night walk out with Duke and the day was done, well not quite because whilst doing some research found some very interesting news.
Yay, yippee, handstands, cartwheels etc etc, who was it that says revenge is a dish best served cold!!! well i enjoyed a lovely slice last night and savouring a little more today. Delicious!
A slightly different day today. Visitors this morning bought Ti ms sister and husband to the door. The first time i have been in the house the same time as them since before Mikey's funeral. Quite strange really. Still the morning had gone before i knew it, lunch and then a ride out before running was the plan. Mid lunch Tom arrived and stayed for most of the afternoon. Oh dear when Tim and Tom get bees in their bonnets its like a war zone and I'm stuck in the middle! why is it that no one wants to give ground. As a peacemaker, usually you upset one or the other. Time to run!!!!
Had a really good run tonight, a little cooler and the knee felt OK plus i was in the mood to burn off some energy! We made really good time tonight. Just to round the night off we had a ride through flagrass to cool the muscles down! The nights are really drawing in and we needed lights on at 2030hrs.
Still a little frosty at home! but quickly thawed and a pleasant evening watching the Queens mother in law. Fascinating story.
Mickeys friend told us during her visit that another of his friends was very poorly at the moment. How sad it is an how cruel CF is. If only we had a cure it would be wonderful. Its that thought and that situation that makes me realise just how insignificant everything else in life is. Live for the moment because tomorrow may never come!
But for the most of us mere mortals that's what we think about isn't it, today, tomorrow , yesterday. Every day i close my blog with the same words. But for me its just that, tomorrow is just another day..........................
Sunday 19 August 2012
Day 740
Yay!! another day managing to blog. Must be a record for some time.
Its been hot!oh my word, summer has flown in but the days are getting shorter so e cant enjoy the balmy evenings outside as well as we would like, ah well.
Today we did sit out listening to the cricket, love the commentary.
Tom arrived just in time for BBQ, Dukes first, it was hilarious watching him. Tom managed to get home last night OK but said, those lights, they don't light the road up! they are only good enough to let other road users I'm there! Well what could i say..............
Tom was saying how hot it is in his bungalow, well have you any fans, no they are still in Doncaster!!! a year on i hasten to say. So when he left he took our spare, lets hope tonight mine doesn't fail!!
The gate! yes we have said we needed to sort a new one for the car port, Duke is now managing to bend the hinges and before long he will be running down the road. So i decided to go and fetch some timber. Ha! bought it, having first gone down 5 layers on the stack to obtain what i thought were straight pieces and then reached the car, um would it fit. So glowing profusely i put the back seats down covered the car the best i could, still had the sheets in the car from decorating at Toms. Thank goodness for an estate!! driving home with the wood gradually slipping towards me as i negotiated round abouts! blessed things who's idea was that! Anyway reached home safely and started to unload! Husband appears. Yes!!! he eyes each piece and starts to inform me that they were not all straight, grrrrrrrrrr. Smiling nicely hinted that at least i had been but they could always go back if he wished!! Dd he need anything else no had everything. So off i went gain to collect the items i wanted for the afternoon. Shops close at 4pm and it as now 1540hrs! Friend phoned about our run and that was set for 7pm.
Home again and husband says, the nails are not long enough. Glancing casually at my watch i said oh dear the shops are closed. Silence...................
Set off tonight for my run but so hot, madness!! When i reached Sues we decided to cycle tonight so we managed 12 miles in just over an hour, not bad going i thought! By the time we finished it was getting dark and it looks as if we may need to start the early Sunday runs or go a bit earlier in the evening!
It will soon be dark for our training runs and then the frostbite season soon starts.
I'm going to try and download Keane's Strangeland album onto my ipod! tricky. Tom told me today i should not be in charge of equipment if i do not know how to use it. He threw his hands into the air earlier when he was explaining the Internet and computer. Just left me to it. I remember Mikey saying and doing just the same! Old dogs new tricks springs to mind!
Right i best go and try to get into bed before 3! i do seem to be having problems getting up in the mornings! oh and i need to check train times for next week, oh and i have clinic appointment at 11am! Nails! yes i suppose i will be traipsing to town for those as well. Ah well tomorrow is another day.........................
Its been hot!oh my word, summer has flown in but the days are getting shorter so e cant enjoy the balmy evenings outside as well as we would like, ah well.
Today we did sit out listening to the cricket, love the commentary.
Tom arrived just in time for BBQ, Dukes first, it was hilarious watching him. Tom managed to get home last night OK but said, those lights, they don't light the road up! they are only good enough to let other road users I'm there! Well what could i say..............
Tom was saying how hot it is in his bungalow, well have you any fans, no they are still in Doncaster!!! a year on i hasten to say. So when he left he took our spare, lets hope tonight mine doesn't fail!!
The gate! yes we have said we needed to sort a new one for the car port, Duke is now managing to bend the hinges and before long he will be running down the road. So i decided to go and fetch some timber. Ha! bought it, having first gone down 5 layers on the stack to obtain what i thought were straight pieces and then reached the car, um would it fit. So glowing profusely i put the back seats down covered the car the best i could, still had the sheets in the car from decorating at Toms. Thank goodness for an estate!! driving home with the wood gradually slipping towards me as i negotiated round abouts! blessed things who's idea was that! Anyway reached home safely and started to unload! Husband appears. Yes!!! he eyes each piece and starts to inform me that they were not all straight, grrrrrrrrrr. Smiling nicely hinted that at least i had been but they could always go back if he wished!! Dd he need anything else no had everything. So off i went gain to collect the items i wanted for the afternoon. Shops close at 4pm and it as now 1540hrs! Friend phoned about our run and that was set for 7pm.
Home again and husband says, the nails are not long enough. Glancing casually at my watch i said oh dear the shops are closed. Silence...................
Set off tonight for my run but so hot, madness!! When i reached Sues we decided to cycle tonight so we managed 12 miles in just over an hour, not bad going i thought! By the time we finished it was getting dark and it looks as if we may need to start the early Sunday runs or go a bit earlier in the evening!
It will soon be dark for our training runs and then the frostbite season soon starts.
I'm going to try and download Keane's Strangeland album onto my ipod! tricky. Tom told me today i should not be in charge of equipment if i do not know how to use it. He threw his hands into the air earlier when he was explaining the Internet and computer. Just left me to it. I remember Mikey saying and doing just the same! Old dogs new tricks springs to mind!
Right i best go and try to get into bed before 3! i do seem to be having problems getting up in the mornings! oh and i need to check train times for next week, oh and i have clinic appointment at 11am! Nails! yes i suppose i will be traipsing to town for those as well. Ah well tomorrow is another day.........................
Saturday 18 August 2012
Day 739
Wonders of wonders here i am again! Its been the hottest day of the year today and its still very warm.
Day in the garden. I noticed for the second day running no bird song, no bees hummimg and realised that this is the norm now. I cant remember a day when i have sat out and heard these normal summer day sounds. I wonder if its because the town has built up and the changes to our environment. Certainly nature seems to be drifting father away from us.
After we lost Mikey i still heard the owl outside his window that kept him awake nights at a time, but even he hasn't returned recently. I miss that screeching noise and the odd hoot.
My crows! they too have been very quite, i must get out and about more and see whats occurring.
This evening Tim took me out so i could see the harvest being gathered, i love this time of year from now until the end of October. The landscape is changing every day. The combines today were leaving clouds of dry dust in their wake and the horizon was scattered with these grimy coloured clouds. Tractors were moving at speed for a change, taking the crop to the silos, for the first time tonight i saw the grain store alight, farmers are working late it would appear. Only a few days of sunshine to get the crop in before the rain comes! I managed to get some snaps and will try and post them tomorrow. I have been busy all day, well at times during the day! printing off photos for my albums. Loads of them. Well we will not go there! i spent most of yesterdays blog reflecting the whys and where fores.
This evening Tom had me driving out to the back of beyond with some cycle lights!!! now who goes out in the evening unprepared. The things we do. I took the wrong turning, now that's about normal for me, no sense of direction hence my forthcoming travels will be by train! i thought Billericay was in Ireland, well not really but that's how bad i am! So a six point turn on a country lane with ditches on either side, not an experience i want to repeat! only to find him creeping about in the gloom trying to scare me witless when i found him! Some things don't change. Why he needs to be out in the sticks is beyond me but as he says, you have to try something different and i guess you do, but please, giving your mother a heart attack surely is a bit extreme!
Once he checked that there was batteries included! by using the headlights of the car, he announced he would see me tomorrow for dinner and he would be bringing his washing! I took that statement to be my marching orders! So i left him with his friends to fix the lights to his bike and eventually find his way home.
This time last week we were getting settled for the Wicken adventure how time really does fly.
Its still odd how i have these waves of sadness, followed by good memories of Mikey, never seem to have one without the other. Mike remains constantly in our minds and today he would have loved it. He would have been n his shorts, no socks with his trainers, laces undone, baseball hat and his shades! but that would have been on a good day and he didn't get many of those towards the end of his summer.
The computer is still playing up! full of Trojans that i swept out today still may have to have Dave back to sort it again. Tim will love that!
I'm going to watch another episode of the Game of Thrones whilst i stick my pics in order of dates in the books! I will then try to sleep, ah well tomorrow is another day................
Day in the garden. I noticed for the second day running no bird song, no bees hummimg and realised that this is the norm now. I cant remember a day when i have sat out and heard these normal summer day sounds. I wonder if its because the town has built up and the changes to our environment. Certainly nature seems to be drifting father away from us.
After we lost Mikey i still heard the owl outside his window that kept him awake nights at a time, but even he hasn't returned recently. I miss that screeching noise and the odd hoot.
My crows! they too have been very quite, i must get out and about more and see whats occurring.
This evening Tim took me out so i could see the harvest being gathered, i love this time of year from now until the end of October. The landscape is changing every day. The combines today were leaving clouds of dry dust in their wake and the horizon was scattered with these grimy coloured clouds. Tractors were moving at speed for a change, taking the crop to the silos, for the first time tonight i saw the grain store alight, farmers are working late it would appear. Only a few days of sunshine to get the crop in before the rain comes! I managed to get some snaps and will try and post them tomorrow. I have been busy all day, well at times during the day! printing off photos for my albums. Loads of them. Well we will not go there! i spent most of yesterdays blog reflecting the whys and where fores.
This evening Tom had me driving out to the back of beyond with some cycle lights!!! now who goes out in the evening unprepared. The things we do. I took the wrong turning, now that's about normal for me, no sense of direction hence my forthcoming travels will be by train! i thought Billericay was in Ireland, well not really but that's how bad i am! So a six point turn on a country lane with ditches on either side, not an experience i want to repeat! only to find him creeping about in the gloom trying to scare me witless when i found him! Some things don't change. Why he needs to be out in the sticks is beyond me but as he says, you have to try something different and i guess you do, but please, giving your mother a heart attack surely is a bit extreme!
Once he checked that there was batteries included! by using the headlights of the car, he announced he would see me tomorrow for dinner and he would be bringing his washing! I took that statement to be my marching orders! So i left him with his friends to fix the lights to his bike and eventually find his way home.
This time last week we were getting settled for the Wicken adventure how time really does fly.
Its still odd how i have these waves of sadness, followed by good memories of Mikey, never seem to have one without the other. Mike remains constantly in our minds and today he would have loved it. He would have been n his shorts, no socks with his trainers, laces undone, baseball hat and his shades! but that would have been on a good day and he didn't get many of those towards the end of his summer.
The computer is still playing up! full of Trojans that i swept out today still may have to have Dave back to sort it again. Tim will love that!
I'm going to watch another episode of the Game of Thrones whilst i stick my pics in order of dates in the books! I will then try to sleep, ah well tomorrow is another day................
Friday 17 August 2012
Day 738
How odd, this page just came up without me signing in. Must be in shock because I'm here the next day!!
Goodness its so warm, no air this evening. Lets hope i wake in the morning a pound lighter. I have my doubts about that though.
It remains hard to get motivated! the more time off work the less i think i want to start, on the other hand it is quite boring. I'm not used to it. 2 months off work and i haven't really done anything useful at all! i suppose once I'm back in working mode i will wish i had done more when i had the opportunity, ah well such is life.
I'm trying to put together some albums of my running, the Olympic run and marathon but i was questioning myself today who they are for? and why I'm doing it. Maybe they will be used in my later years to trigger my memories. Sad that that's all they will do. I'm a hoarder, the loft full of things that may come in useful sometime. That time never comes does it, so why on earth i continue to behave in the same manner bemuses me. Perhaps i should have a sort out, after all Tom will be left to do that at some stage and do i really want him to have that task. Like me he too is a hoarder and then he will be surrounded by a load of useless things that he will never look at even though he thinks he will!
The thought of some one else browsing through my knicker draw fills me with horror! So do i start throwing bits away? goodness my wardrobes, loft, cupboards etc are heaving with clothes that i may just get into some day. The chances are if that ever happens it will be the return of said fashion, possibly the third time round. I still have platform soled shoes in the loft from the 70's i suppose i could bring them down, i guess they are called retro now!
Isn't the mind a peculiar thing. How many of us sit a let our thoughts drift to the what ifs, the maybes and perhaps. We should just live day to day but we are a nation of planners, we plan for our weddings, our babies and our old age, why on earth are we so intent on passing our time away with useless things! Is it what makes us who we are? then there are times perhaps i could be someone else, but then i wouldn't be who i am or have the people in my life would i. You see a typical situation of time wasting!!!
I guess this blog has now changed to a diary, or has it. Its still my private place where i can shrug off the worries of the day and it has certainly kept me sane over the last two years. For that i thank Mikey who kept a blog and gave me the idea, so very long ago now it seems.
Thank goodness for Duke these last few weeks or i think we would have gone mad, Tim at least has something to do and something who depends on him for his well being, always good be needed. Maybe that's whats wrong with me at the moment, i don't feel needed.
I keep telling myself to get a grip, but as you can tell its not working!
Well i have read the books i wanted to read for ages and never had the time, watched the DVDs that i have been wanting to see, so I'm all caught up! what next!! i will no doubt be letting my mind drift when i crawl into bed at some godforsaken time. Wait for the eyelids to drop unaided, wake with the light on, specs on the nose still or under the armpits if I'm not so lucky. I have ruined so many pairs of specs that way recently, i have a hoard of those as well!! all colours.
Accessing FB is still problematic so i suppose my little computer man will have to be called out again! i have all the protection but these beastly viruses creep in undetected. I have to say it also makes me question the world we live in, how easy it is for all our information to be obtained by pressing a button. I wonder who has been scanning these pages, a bit like the knicker draw scenario ist it. Um food for thought, or nightmares if you think too hard.
Harvesting is going on all around us and the air is heavy with dust, i must try and get some photographs, we haven't been out for ages. I will suggest it to Tim tomorrow, depending on what time i get up!!!
Do you know i sit here looking at the fan wondering why on earth i haven't put it on. Wish we had air conditioning but i suppose it will be years before all houses are built with that as a normal feature.
Well Dukes asking to go out Tim's asleep, as usual so i best let him out, make a cup of tea and watch a movie! and try to sleep.
Ah well tomorrow is another day.......................
Goodness its so warm, no air this evening. Lets hope i wake in the morning a pound lighter. I have my doubts about that though.
It remains hard to get motivated! the more time off work the less i think i want to start, on the other hand it is quite boring. I'm not used to it. 2 months off work and i haven't really done anything useful at all! i suppose once I'm back in working mode i will wish i had done more when i had the opportunity, ah well such is life.
I'm trying to put together some albums of my running, the Olympic run and marathon but i was questioning myself today who they are for? and why I'm doing it. Maybe they will be used in my later years to trigger my memories. Sad that that's all they will do. I'm a hoarder, the loft full of things that may come in useful sometime. That time never comes does it, so why on earth i continue to behave in the same manner bemuses me. Perhaps i should have a sort out, after all Tom will be left to do that at some stage and do i really want him to have that task. Like me he too is a hoarder and then he will be surrounded by a load of useless things that he will never look at even though he thinks he will!
The thought of some one else browsing through my knicker draw fills me with horror! So do i start throwing bits away? goodness my wardrobes, loft, cupboards etc are heaving with clothes that i may just get into some day. The chances are if that ever happens it will be the return of said fashion, possibly the third time round. I still have platform soled shoes in the loft from the 70's i suppose i could bring them down, i guess they are called retro now!
Isn't the mind a peculiar thing. How many of us sit a let our thoughts drift to the what ifs, the maybes and perhaps. We should just live day to day but we are a nation of planners, we plan for our weddings, our babies and our old age, why on earth are we so intent on passing our time away with useless things! Is it what makes us who we are? then there are times perhaps i could be someone else, but then i wouldn't be who i am or have the people in my life would i. You see a typical situation of time wasting!!!
I guess this blog has now changed to a diary, or has it. Its still my private place where i can shrug off the worries of the day and it has certainly kept me sane over the last two years. For that i thank Mikey who kept a blog and gave me the idea, so very long ago now it seems.
Thank goodness for Duke these last few weeks or i think we would have gone mad, Tim at least has something to do and something who depends on him for his well being, always good be needed. Maybe that's whats wrong with me at the moment, i don't feel needed.
I keep telling myself to get a grip, but as you can tell its not working!
Well i have read the books i wanted to read for ages and never had the time, watched the DVDs that i have been wanting to see, so I'm all caught up! what next!! i will no doubt be letting my mind drift when i crawl into bed at some godforsaken time. Wait for the eyelids to drop unaided, wake with the light on, specs on the nose still or under the armpits if I'm not so lucky. I have ruined so many pairs of specs that way recently, i have a hoard of those as well!! all colours.
Accessing FB is still problematic so i suppose my little computer man will have to be called out again! i have all the protection but these beastly viruses creep in undetected. I have to say it also makes me question the world we live in, how easy it is for all our information to be obtained by pressing a button. I wonder who has been scanning these pages, a bit like the knicker draw scenario ist it. Um food for thought, or nightmares if you think too hard.
Harvesting is going on all around us and the air is heavy with dust, i must try and get some photographs, we haven't been out for ages. I will suggest it to Tim tomorrow, depending on what time i get up!!!
Do you know i sit here looking at the fan wondering why on earth i haven't put it on. Wish we had air conditioning but i suppose it will be years before all houses are built with that as a normal feature.
Well Dukes asking to go out Tim's asleep, as usual so i best let him out, make a cup of tea and watch a movie! and try to sleep.
Ah well tomorrow is another day.......................
Thursday 16 August 2012
DAYS 735-737
Um a daytime blog, i think this is a first!! Reason being my fb page has been phished so its damned hard to access even with the changes i have made!
So its been a strange 3 days, there seems to be a bit of a void in my life. I sit here and wait for something to happen or something to do, somewhere to go. I am missing Mikey in a most unusual way. Not with the overwhelming sadness but its like when i used to get home from work and get ready to go and visit, but the visit never happens! really strange.
Toms been spending a little more time with us, probably because he is on holiday this week.
Monday we had a lovely visit from Mikes friend maybe that's why i am remembering all sorts of things , not sure.
Race last night and oddly made the best time for a 5k for months! had my running legs on apparently! Taken off 3 minutes since my July race so that's fab!! long may it last. Just so frustrating that i have to wait till October now for my op. Get the results of the ballot for London Marathon in October as well. Fingers crossed. More training.
The weather is so warm again, however thank goodness last night was cooler following the rain. Traffic was bad and we got diverted, when we reached the meet we were practically thrown out of the car and put to the start! literally minutes before the klaxon sounded. No sign of Arthur tonight!!
Tim's just popped out across the fields with Duke who has now got an ear infection, may have a grass seed down there somewhere, back to vets in two weeks!
May add some more later if i can get access!!!
If not tomorrow is another day...................
So its been a strange 3 days, there seems to be a bit of a void in my life. I sit here and wait for something to happen or something to do, somewhere to go. I am missing Mikey in a most unusual way. Not with the overwhelming sadness but its like when i used to get home from work and get ready to go and visit, but the visit never happens! really strange.
Toms been spending a little more time with us, probably because he is on holiday this week.
Monday we had a lovely visit from Mikes friend maybe that's why i am remembering all sorts of things , not sure.
Race last night and oddly made the best time for a 5k for months! had my running legs on apparently! Taken off 3 minutes since my July race so that's fab!! long may it last. Just so frustrating that i have to wait till October now for my op. Get the results of the ballot for London Marathon in October as well. Fingers crossed. More training.
The weather is so warm again, however thank goodness last night was cooler following the rain. Traffic was bad and we got diverted, when we reached the meet we were practically thrown out of the car and put to the start! literally minutes before the klaxon sounded. No sign of Arthur tonight!!
Tim's just popped out across the fields with Duke who has now got an ear infection, may have a grass seed down there somewhere, back to vets in two weeks!
May add some more later if i can get access!!!
If not tomorrow is another day...................
Monday 13 August 2012
Day 730-734
Couldn't do it! just couldn't write my blog for the past few days. It didn't matter how often i sat here i was so reluctant to write.
I'm not sure what to do now, it seems as though everything w aid we would do, we now have and its really hard to find any motivation. Will it return, i hope so.
The Olympics was special to us and we watched avidly, rarely missing anything. Tom,. who had no interest found himself watching and enjoying the whole two weeks. Lovely to hear him and Tim discussing the events. It was always Mikey who would either pick up the phone and speak to his Dad or vice versa. Usually Mikey though.
How strange it was that the Olympics was on at this time when its hardest for us and the closing ceremony on his anniversary. It made the day in some way more bearable. Of course the Perseid meteor shower on the same day. A remarkable day all in all.
A day of smiles and a day of wonder.
We set out late on Saturday to Wicken Fen to catch the shower at its peak in the early hours of the 12th. An eventful night.
We arrived at Wicken to find my sister and her husband and youngest daughter waiting. I arrived with her eldest daughter and a friend. We donned our head torches, carried our seats and rucksacks and headed out into the darkness. I couldn't quite understand why i was not shining any light on the path ahead until i was told i was blinding everyone as mine was on upside down. How wonderful it was when put on correctly the vision improved and my way was clear! Traipsing through foliage and sticking to the path became an adventure. Water on one side and tress on the other, no railings on the bridge we crossed and scanty info from the web site. Last years visit cloudy in my memories! We picked our site, lovely bench and plenty of free space, silence, no not at all!! music blaring across the fen we sat listening to the sounds of Madness, Dexys Midnight Runners and all the rest of 70,s groups until a slow number came on and we knew it was coming to a close. We heard the DJ giving his closing words and then we could listen to the sounds of nature, or so we thought.
We watched the most amazing shooting star streak across the sky a glorious sight a meteor indeed, the wide fiery tail just wonderful, we all oohed and ahhhed at the spectacle.
So we had our hot coffee poured and ready for the next and then Hamish raised the alarm. Having earlier scared the girls with ghostly tails the reaction to the following event was and should not be seen as surprising!
With no lights on, pitch dark our hearing had obviously became more sensitive the noise Hamish heard and the gasp of there is someone on the path in front of us had us all swivelling on our seats and the old heart started to race, Can you see them i heard the noise. I said it was my friend Sue in her gum packet, turning to her i found an empty seat! it was in fact Sue having thought to herself she may see more standing, silently rose and stood on the path in front of us like a phantom!! The relief was instantaneous followed by loads of giggles and sips of coffee to calm the nerves. All seated and once again watching the sky. And then!!!
Seated with our heads tilted back and just hearing the ducks in the background and the sounds of the owls hunting and the rabbits screaming, an unusual noise, a crunching and a flash of light. Did anyone see that, once again all of us on the edges of our seats peering into the night. Where, over there is that someone walking. After some deliberation we decided no, but then, the light came back, first white then lower down a red glow, eyes??? no we wouldn't see eyes glowing, um Hamish's words came back as a sharp reminder. Did anyone else hear a whinny? no i thought i heard it and a sniffling noise, no surely not. Well there are some horse lose but not this side says Joy with some confidence!. Oops we heard about the enormous pond spiders, they were protected because they are as big as dinner plates so we were told!! no surely not! How odd that the imagination goes into overdrive at a rapid rate of notts!
The light began to move, its someone out there. Enough is enough so i switched my headlamp on and faced the foe. Cant let them know we are worried can we. Joy whispering frantically to turn it off. No everyone put theres on safety in numbers. Well it started to move towards us and then another. Has some one got a dog with them and a light on the collar i wondered. The light at the front was very high. Its a horse with a light on it!! no it cant be and as it got closer we saw several shapes outlined. Um more than one then as the light got closer we could see it was another group of people out to watch the stars. As the got closer we could see the cameras and bags of food. Oh look they have a take away, what a good idea. Foreign visitors speaking in heavily accented English. I thought they asked for the seat, i replied its taken. Hamish said something. They continued passed and set up came several yards away.Hamish said they said he though Perseid but to me it sounded like seat. Anyway once again we settled down to wait.
This time the sounds we heard were very real and very close and rather worrying. Lord only knew what was in store for us now. Stomping of very angry hooves, neighing and you could hear the snuffling noise of lips being blown out. We shone our torches across the field but could see nothing, the more light the more frantic the noise. Is it a wild boar someone said. Blooming heck surely not, now they are dangerous. The other group were also becoming restless. As a group we faced towards the noise yet again. After several minutes and another coffee we decided it was the horses and they were not too happy about being kept up so late. They were probably as scared as we were!! Mikey would have been roaring with laughter.
So yet again we settled to watch the show, whining , whining noises. Gnats. Hoods up to protect ourselves we looked a dangerous group of individuals!
All in all night and morning to remember as we tried to find our way back to the car park. I eventually got to bed at 5am.
Tom came round for lunch which was lovely for me to have him share our day.
Sue text about our Sunday run, so we did that. We decide to cycle to the prison, lock our bikes up and run through the pocket park, however when we reached the club house we spied a gap in the fence so we lifted the front of our cycle sup and made our way into the grounds, locked our cycles and went for a good run. Back to the club house and we decided to go for a ride as well. Home in time to watch the closing ceremony of the Olympics.
Tom came back to watch it with us. A good end to an eventful day. Mikey i think you would have been proud of us.
Sue, Joni, Olivia and Joy
Olivia, Joni and Me
Trying to get the lantern off the ground
Hamish dont let go, its too low
Phew
for you Mikey xx
And so, tomorrow is another day......................................
I'm not sure what to do now, it seems as though everything w aid we would do, we now have and its really hard to find any motivation. Will it return, i hope so.
The Olympics was special to us and we watched avidly, rarely missing anything. Tom,. who had no interest found himself watching and enjoying the whole two weeks. Lovely to hear him and Tim discussing the events. It was always Mikey who would either pick up the phone and speak to his Dad or vice versa. Usually Mikey though.
How strange it was that the Olympics was on at this time when its hardest for us and the closing ceremony on his anniversary. It made the day in some way more bearable. Of course the Perseid meteor shower on the same day. A remarkable day all in all.
A day of smiles and a day of wonder.
We set out late on Saturday to Wicken Fen to catch the shower at its peak in the early hours of the 12th. An eventful night.
We arrived at Wicken to find my sister and her husband and youngest daughter waiting. I arrived with her eldest daughter and a friend. We donned our head torches, carried our seats and rucksacks and headed out into the darkness. I couldn't quite understand why i was not shining any light on the path ahead until i was told i was blinding everyone as mine was on upside down. How wonderful it was when put on correctly the vision improved and my way was clear! Traipsing through foliage and sticking to the path became an adventure. Water on one side and tress on the other, no railings on the bridge we crossed and scanty info from the web site. Last years visit cloudy in my memories! We picked our site, lovely bench and plenty of free space, silence, no not at all!! music blaring across the fen we sat listening to the sounds of Madness, Dexys Midnight Runners and all the rest of 70,s groups until a slow number came on and we knew it was coming to a close. We heard the DJ giving his closing words and then we could listen to the sounds of nature, or so we thought.
We watched the most amazing shooting star streak across the sky a glorious sight a meteor indeed, the wide fiery tail just wonderful, we all oohed and ahhhed at the spectacle.
So we had our hot coffee poured and ready for the next and then Hamish raised the alarm. Having earlier scared the girls with ghostly tails the reaction to the following event was and should not be seen as surprising!
With no lights on, pitch dark our hearing had obviously became more sensitive the noise Hamish heard and the gasp of there is someone on the path in front of us had us all swivelling on our seats and the old heart started to race, Can you see them i heard the noise. I said it was my friend Sue in her gum packet, turning to her i found an empty seat! it was in fact Sue having thought to herself she may see more standing, silently rose and stood on the path in front of us like a phantom!! The relief was instantaneous followed by loads of giggles and sips of coffee to calm the nerves. All seated and once again watching the sky. And then!!!
Seated with our heads tilted back and just hearing the ducks in the background and the sounds of the owls hunting and the rabbits screaming, an unusual noise, a crunching and a flash of light. Did anyone see that, once again all of us on the edges of our seats peering into the night. Where, over there is that someone walking. After some deliberation we decided no, but then, the light came back, first white then lower down a red glow, eyes??? no we wouldn't see eyes glowing, um Hamish's words came back as a sharp reminder. Did anyone else hear a whinny? no i thought i heard it and a sniffling noise, no surely not. Well there are some horse lose but not this side says Joy with some confidence!. Oops we heard about the enormous pond spiders, they were protected because they are as big as dinner plates so we were told!! no surely not! How odd that the imagination goes into overdrive at a rapid rate of notts!
The light began to move, its someone out there. Enough is enough so i switched my headlamp on and faced the foe. Cant let them know we are worried can we. Joy whispering frantically to turn it off. No everyone put theres on safety in numbers. Well it started to move towards us and then another. Has some one got a dog with them and a light on the collar i wondered. The light at the front was very high. Its a horse with a light on it!! no it cant be and as it got closer we saw several shapes outlined. Um more than one then as the light got closer we could see it was another group of people out to watch the stars. As the got closer we could see the cameras and bags of food. Oh look they have a take away, what a good idea. Foreign visitors speaking in heavily accented English. I thought they asked for the seat, i replied its taken. Hamish said something. They continued passed and set up came several yards away.Hamish said they said he though Perseid but to me it sounded like seat. Anyway once again we settled down to wait.
This time the sounds we heard were very real and very close and rather worrying. Lord only knew what was in store for us now. Stomping of very angry hooves, neighing and you could hear the snuffling noise of lips being blown out. We shone our torches across the field but could see nothing, the more light the more frantic the noise. Is it a wild boar someone said. Blooming heck surely not, now they are dangerous. The other group were also becoming restless. As a group we faced towards the noise yet again. After several minutes and another coffee we decided it was the horses and they were not too happy about being kept up so late. They were probably as scared as we were!! Mikey would have been roaring with laughter.
So yet again we settled to watch the show, whining , whining noises. Gnats. Hoods up to protect ourselves we looked a dangerous group of individuals!
All in all night and morning to remember as we tried to find our way back to the car park. I eventually got to bed at 5am.
Tom came round for lunch which was lovely for me to have him share our day.
Sue text about our Sunday run, so we did that. We decide to cycle to the prison, lock our bikes up and run through the pocket park, however when we reached the club house we spied a gap in the fence so we lifted the front of our cycle sup and made our way into the grounds, locked our cycles and went for a good run. Back to the club house and we decided to go for a ride as well. Home in time to watch the closing ceremony of the Olympics.
Tom came back to watch it with us. A good end to an eventful day. Mikey i think you would have been proud of us.
Olivia, Joni and Me
Hamish dont let go, its too low
for you Mikey xx
And so, tomorrow is another day......................................
Wednesday 8 August 2012
Days 724-729
Its been a strange week. A week where i have desperately tried to keep busy and positive and yet it is without doubt one of the most difficult periods of the year.
So i have found my mood swinging from one extreme to the other.
The Olympics have been amazing and we know how much Mikey would have been enjoying them and making may a comment about the athletes prowess. The mens 100 metres a sure topic of conversation. So a sad time in many ways. The one good thing is that i have been able to watch them all and with no worries about time!
Misery has been relentless in her pursuit recently, she seems to have this instinct when you are at a low ebb and then attacks with such ferocity that i have been wrapped yet again in her black embrace. Often whilst driving! I cant begin to say how hard this week is, preparing the memorial for the paper, I'm only pleased that i had asked last year for the paper to keep my notice on file and then at least i didn't have to go through re reading it out over the phone, but just in case my friend found a copy on her computer and sent it to me. So very kind. Still that's done now until Friday when the Cambs Times is delivered and we will see it again in black and white.
We are going to Wicken Fen again this weekend to watch the Perseid Meteor shower and to set of some sky lanterns for Mikey, a few more of us going this year.
I have been for two interviews and been lucky to have been offered them both. I'm going for the one with the opportunity to do Diploma in Dementia and then a Degree. Not sure of start date, well that's because i haven't told them i have accepted! perhaps know more tomorrow! After all the turmoil of the last 8 weeks i do believe that all things happen for a reason and up to now it would appear that leaving my job has been the best thing for me. I didn't see it at the time but i know time will tell however I'm feeling positive. Looking forward to a new challenge!
Running, well i ran alone last night and managed 5.7 miles! so quite pleased but today the knee has been sore. Sister Jen went for a trial session with her local running club! goodness after watching me in one race it has inspired her to join the ranks of street runners. I hope she does well.
I have booked a place in the Great Eastern run and should be doing a half marathon but do wonder if i will be fit enough. I need to get some longer runs in now if i can manage it otherwise i will not be able to do it even if fit!!
Up to Doncaster all day today helping out at Toms, Duke has become quite a seasoned traveller!
I must remember camera, tripod and head light for the weekend! still i needn't worry about that now, after all Tomorrow is another day.........................
So i have found my mood swinging from one extreme to the other.
The Olympics have been amazing and we know how much Mikey would have been enjoying them and making may a comment about the athletes prowess. The mens 100 metres a sure topic of conversation. So a sad time in many ways. The one good thing is that i have been able to watch them all and with no worries about time!
Misery has been relentless in her pursuit recently, she seems to have this instinct when you are at a low ebb and then attacks with such ferocity that i have been wrapped yet again in her black embrace. Often whilst driving! I cant begin to say how hard this week is, preparing the memorial for the paper, I'm only pleased that i had asked last year for the paper to keep my notice on file and then at least i didn't have to go through re reading it out over the phone, but just in case my friend found a copy on her computer and sent it to me. So very kind. Still that's done now until Friday when the Cambs Times is delivered and we will see it again in black and white.
We are going to Wicken Fen again this weekend to watch the Perseid Meteor shower and to set of some sky lanterns for Mikey, a few more of us going this year.
I have been for two interviews and been lucky to have been offered them both. I'm going for the one with the opportunity to do Diploma in Dementia and then a Degree. Not sure of start date, well that's because i haven't told them i have accepted! perhaps know more tomorrow! After all the turmoil of the last 8 weeks i do believe that all things happen for a reason and up to now it would appear that leaving my job has been the best thing for me. I didn't see it at the time but i know time will tell however I'm feeling positive. Looking forward to a new challenge!
Running, well i ran alone last night and managed 5.7 miles! so quite pleased but today the knee has been sore. Sister Jen went for a trial session with her local running club! goodness after watching me in one race it has inspired her to join the ranks of street runners. I hope she does well.
I have booked a place in the Great Eastern run and should be doing a half marathon but do wonder if i will be fit enough. I need to get some longer runs in now if i can manage it otherwise i will not be able to do it even if fit!!
Up to Doncaster all day today helping out at Toms, Duke has become quite a seasoned traveller!
I must remember camera, tripod and head light for the weekend! still i needn't worry about that now, after all Tomorrow is another day.........................
Thursday 2 August 2012
day 720-723
At last i got some answers about the knee. A bit of a surprise! not only did i tear a cartilage but i tore two in the same knee. The medial and the lateral ones so i well and truly did some damage. No wonder I'm struggling! well that makes me feel a little better anyway. So it looks like i will have the op at the beginning of September and hopefully i will be fit to run the Great East run in October but I'm not too sure as i will not have been able to train for it. Ah well i guess there will always be another time.
Run went well on Tuesday only did 3 miles as i had the race on Wednesday. That went well too. Jen my sister came to watch as she lived close to the venue, it was good to have someone come and support me. Sue also came and watched but she was not well enough to run. Managed to get my t shirt!!! before the race, just in case. Managed to run 3 Min's faster than last time so pleased with that.
Training tonight did another 3.25 and had no problems so maybe i should stick to the little runs for now. well i will see how Sunday goes. Tim thinks i should cycle more in between to keep my fitness up and perhaps he is right!
Work well i have been lucky i suppose to get asked to attend some interviews but i wont bank on anything just yet. Want to sort my knee out really before i get back to work.
We are coming up to the anniversary again and are going to Wicken Fen to see the Perseid meteor shower in the middle of the night. Always an adventure of sorts. We will let off some lanterns for Mikey. I must also put a piece in the paper, i find that so hard but Tim mentioned it today.
I have been glued to the Olympics and to think i have been able to watch everyday that's a novel experience and one i didn't know how i would manage to achieve when we said we would do that . Its true, things happen for a reason. The athletics start tomorrow.
Just reading back through the page as Duke was rattling the door blind to be let out! and noticed i have been using the word managed quite a lot! how appropriate.
I cant believe it been 8 weeks since i last worked! the time has gone and i haven't really missed it. Must have been dragging me down for that to have happened! I have kept quite busy though. On the plus side had lots of lie ins! I have also been baking to my sister Linda's amazement! Now why is that i wonder. I made Tim a pasty, he said it was years since i made him one, when i put it on his plate he looked and said blimey Sue Capn Ahabs strapped to its back!! i think it was a bit on the big side! still Duke enjoyed it.
The nights are drawing in already and it will soon be Autumn and we really have had no summer, maybe we will have an Indian summer again.
Not sure what i am doing tomorrow but it looks like another visit to Doncaster on Saturday to do some more decorating!
I completed a questionnaire yesterday and it frequently asked if i planned for the future and i had to answer no. At this moment in time we live day to day, is there any other way i wonder.
I have done some retail therapy this week! lovely more jeans! i really don't need any but those and shoes are my weakness! it could be worse. Now come to think of it my running kit has grown quite considerably!
I had a visit from a friend today and it was lovely to see her! i know its been hard for her as well because we worked together but she decided to pop in on her lunch break and we didn't talk work!!!!! hope its not going to be so long before we meet up again. Well i better look at my notices, because tomorrow is another day...........
Run went well on Tuesday only did 3 miles as i had the race on Wednesday. That went well too. Jen my sister came to watch as she lived close to the venue, it was good to have someone come and support me. Sue also came and watched but she was not well enough to run. Managed to get my t shirt!!! before the race, just in case. Managed to run 3 Min's faster than last time so pleased with that.
Training tonight did another 3.25 and had no problems so maybe i should stick to the little runs for now. well i will see how Sunday goes. Tim thinks i should cycle more in between to keep my fitness up and perhaps he is right!
Work well i have been lucky i suppose to get asked to attend some interviews but i wont bank on anything just yet. Want to sort my knee out really before i get back to work.
We are coming up to the anniversary again and are going to Wicken Fen to see the Perseid meteor shower in the middle of the night. Always an adventure of sorts. We will let off some lanterns for Mikey. I must also put a piece in the paper, i find that so hard but Tim mentioned it today.
I have been glued to the Olympics and to think i have been able to watch everyday that's a novel experience and one i didn't know how i would manage to achieve when we said we would do that . Its true, things happen for a reason. The athletics start tomorrow.
Just reading back through the page as Duke was rattling the door blind to be let out! and noticed i have been using the word managed quite a lot! how appropriate.
I cant believe it been 8 weeks since i last worked! the time has gone and i haven't really missed it. Must have been dragging me down for that to have happened! I have kept quite busy though. On the plus side had lots of lie ins! I have also been baking to my sister Linda's amazement! Now why is that i wonder. I made Tim a pasty, he said it was years since i made him one, when i put it on his plate he looked and said blimey Sue Capn Ahabs strapped to its back!! i think it was a bit on the big side! still Duke enjoyed it.
The nights are drawing in already and it will soon be Autumn and we really have had no summer, maybe we will have an Indian summer again.
Not sure what i am doing tomorrow but it looks like another visit to Doncaster on Saturday to do some more decorating!
I completed a questionnaire yesterday and it frequently asked if i planned for the future and i had to answer no. At this moment in time we live day to day, is there any other way i wonder.
I have done some retail therapy this week! lovely more jeans! i really don't need any but those and shoes are my weakness! it could be worse. Now come to think of it my running kit has grown quite considerably!
I had a visit from a friend today and it was lovely to see her! i know its been hard for her as well because we worked together but she decided to pop in on her lunch break and we didn't talk work!!!!! hope its not going to be so long before we meet up again. Well i better look at my notices, because tomorrow is another day...........
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