Thank you everyone who sent messages etc to see if we were OK because i missed yesterday. Its surprising the number of people reading this blog but not a follower. I really appreciated your thoughts and kindness.
Yesterday i was so tired. The last twelve weeks have been a horrendous journey and this whole grieving process one of confusion, anger,disbelief and so so incredibly painful. I just hadn't got the energy to sit and write.
It has been 12 weeks today and Thursdays are my nemesis.
I left early this morning to go to Oxford and the events of the day certainly kept my mind occupied, that and the company of three very very cheerful ladies i was travelling with. The fact that we got lost on the way added to the drama!! It was late by the time i arrived home still tired!!
Tim's been busy and rearranged the lounge and has also placed Mikey in a special place in the lounge too. It feels right and our house seems like home again its lost that empty feeling.
Whilst the weekend was difficult, i feel comfortable in the knowledge that we have Mike here.
Tom phoned today and his dad told him what transpired and he was very upset. Tom feels that he cannot understand the reasons for us to be denied our feelings and our place in Mikes life.
I do think that we cannot go back and on Monday made a huge effort to move forward with this process. I am not naive enough to think everything will be fine. The road is long and hard that out of hell leads to light, and so i travel. This phase of the journey will be fraught with trials and hardships but i will overcome. I have to otherwise living will have no joy. Mike bought us so much of that. I must remember!!
I'm off tomorrow and hope to go and take some Autumnal photographs the trees and hedgerows are stunning. They will play large part in the book!!!
I'm feeling fit so the exercise will begin in earnest again, managed 3 miles Monday and Tuesday.
Well im off to bed and am sure about one thing, tomorrow is another day....................
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